8 hours & a lunch

anything is possible, everything is not

Anything is possible.

I believe it.  Do you?  

Anything is possible.  Look around at the accomplishments and achievements of others.  We can all think of examples of people who came from humble circumstances to achieve greatness.

 It might take work.  It might take time.  Things don't happen magically and they don't happen overnight.  But anything is possible.

Everything, though, is not.  

As I work with clients in keeping their edge in their lives and businesses, one of the biggest problems I see is fear of making a choice.  People are often afraid to make a decision. 

We're afraid that once we make a decision, we're stuck there for life.  We put so much pressure on making the right decision that we don't decide at all.  

Think of a river.  It simply flows.   It can be powerful and dangerous or it can be smooth and tranquil.  But it flows, and moves forward naturally.  When we know what our goals are and what direction we want our life and our businesses to head in, it's much like that river.  

That river has banks.  It has boundaries.  Without them, the river would have no direction at all.  It wouldn't even be a river.  It would be a pool of water running off in many directions until it dispersed so far that it no longer existed.

The choices and decisions we make are like the banks of the river.  It's what gives us direction.  And just like a river might have a bend or two, we can change those decisions later as circumstances change or as we gain more information.

Everything is not possible, but anything is.  It starts by making the decision.

All the best!

deb  

P.S.  Help me celebrate the launch of Work Her Way

P.P.S  Give 10.  Pay it forward & pass it on.  Help thousands of kids today.  (Thanks to all of those who have been so generous this far.  Let's keep it going!  With everyone pulling together and doing their small part, we can get this thing done!)

where does possibility dwell?

Uncertainty is the only certainty there is, and knowing how to live with insecurity is the only security - John Allen Paulos

We like security.  We like to be comfortable and think that we know what tomorrow will bring.  After all, if I show up for work every day and work hard, I'll eventually be promoted, right?  And one day, many years down the road, I'll get to retire with the gold watch.  Right.  I believe that recent history has shown us differently.  Those days are gone.  

Where Possibility Dwells

Possibility dwells in uncertainty.  Possibility dwells in the unknown and the unexpected.  Creativity lives in uncertainty too.  The creativity to see a new path, a new direction.  

Everything is always changing.  Nothing stays stagnant forever.  We're either moving forward or moving back.  

And the unexpected happens.  As much as we may try to keep it at bay, the unexpected can and will happen.  And really, how boring would life be if everything worked out exactly according to plan?

As I look back over my own life, I think of a party I went to where I thought I'd know everyone there and met someone new and fell in love.  I think of an opportunity that arose that led me to move someplace I never thought I'd move.  I think of friendships forged at work.  I think of a job I took that I had no idea, in the beginning, how much I'd be allowed to travel or how much I'd learn.  

And especially, starting a business.  Sure.  I knew my reasons why I was starting the business and had the plan in place.  And unexpected twists and turns have happened along the way anyway.  While I was focused on 'working the plan', opportunities came up in other places that led to greater things than I had in mind at the time.  

Where Adventure Lives

Do you look for and appreciate the adventure in your own life?  Do you look forward to ditching the day job?  Do you have a plan but stay open to what might lie ahead that you don't yet see?  

It took courage for early explorers to go past the horizon and discover that the world is round.  But what if no one had done it?  What if no one had taken the risk?  What if no one had thought that computers could become personal or we could one day have phones that we could carry around with us everywhere?  (Yes.  Some of us remember the days before cell phones.)

Staying Open

Especially if you're heading in the direction of ditching the day job and starting a business, there is certainly some planning to be done.  There are certainly responsibilities to consider.  There are calculated risks to be taken.  But when opportunities come up, as they always do at some point, are your eyes open enough to see them?  

And are you willing to explore them?

Do you, as Dickinson said, dwell in possibility?

If not, you're missing out.  

Begin to learn to look for the unknown, to seek it out, to appreciate it.  

The unknown, after all, is where possibility dwells.

All the best!

deb

creating: your life

Yes.  It's true.  It's been about a year and a half in the works, but it's true.  Carolyn Kepcher, formerly of the Apprentice & the Trump Organization, will be launching Work Her Way very very soon.  And yes, I'll be an expert contributor.  

I've been very excited about this site and the community that it will bring together for quite some time now.  So.....

There will be celebration.  Get ready. 

Have a great weekend!

All the best!

deb

And don't forget to sign up for the RSS feed and the newsletter in the right hand sidebar.

why creativity matters (& what being more creative can do for you)

SAT scores are at the lowest in a decade, antidepressant usage went up 50% over 10 years (and usage amongst children aged 6-17 went up 78% during the same time period), unemployment is at a 26-year high, people are screaming at each other in town hall meetings and in the halls of Congress.  And I don’t need to remind you about the financial industry crisis, the auto industry crisis, and the healthcare crisis, right?

When you’re dealing with all of that, who has time for creativity?

Get Your Head Out of The Clouds

Despite the stereotype, most creative people are some of the most grounded and realistic people I know.  

Creative or not, a lot people have their heads in the clouds and sleepwalk through life. 

The nicest woman in the world is so busy being the nicest woman in the world, keeping people around her on their toes as well, that she’s blind-sided by the time she notices the serious problems going on in her life.

When she is forced to take a look at what’s really going on because she can’t avoid it anymore, it’s a much bigger problem than if she’d paid attention when she first saw the little signs and signals and decided to ignore them. 

We’re All In This Together

The same things happens in our careers, in our businesses, and in our society.  We keep doing things the way we’ve always done them, right up until the moment that massive layoff couldn’t be avoided.

This compounds collectively until we’re all feeling the effects of several areas of crisis because we weren’t paying attention.  We were just going about business as usual.  If recent events have showed us anything, it’s that we’re all in it together. 

Not only do we need creative solutions, we need to apply the skills and principles it takes to be creative.

Creative People Pay Attention

When people do creative work, they become completely engrossed in what they’re doing, and experience a sense of timelessness.  

You’ve experienced this at some point in your life.  You feel a sense of meaning in the thing you’re doing, you enjoy it, and you get so into it that you suddenly look up and wonder where the past two hours went.  “7:00 already? How did that happen?”

There is a simple explanation for this. 

Our brains can only process a certain amount of information at a time.  Literally.  

Creative people have the ability to focus their attention like a laser.  And they have the ability to maintain this level of focus until they have accomplished the project and brought their vision to life.  

And they pay attention to details.  They know that details impact the bigger picture.  A photographer can take a picture of a lake.  But the photographer also knows that a simple change in lighting can turn a standard ‘picture of a lake’ into something that communicates a sense of time, mood and the spirit of the place.

Creative People Study & Work Hard

Creative people are committed, investing a great deal of time and energy to be as good as they possibly can.  They study the basics and spend years working on their craft.  

It doesn’t happen magically, and it doesn’t happen overnight.  Learning to play piano, you learn to read music.  Slowly.  You practice scales.  Over and over and over.  

You learn the rules.  After all, it’s only by learning the rules, how things work, that they can then be broken, creating something new.

Creative People Seek Continuous Improvement

But they don’t stop there.  

They’re more disciplined than most people think.  Because they know that getting too comfortable and letting things slide means they’ll lose it.

I didn’t play piano for years.  One night, I was at a friend’s home and decided to sit down and play.  I did okay.  But it wasn’t anywhere near the level of proficiency I’d attained when I practiced daily.  And I knew it.  

Creative people seek out inspiration and new ideas, consistently challenging themselves to improve, technically and artistically.  

They’ll take workshops, read, talk to others in their field.  They’ll look to other areas of their life (or art) and bring a seemingly unrelated thought or approach into their work -- and create something new.

And when they’ve done that?  They put it behind them and look forward to the next challenge, the next improvement.

Seeing What Isn’t There

Creativity is where possibility lies.  It’s the place where we find answers we didn’t see before.  It’s the place where we see the next step, even when things are good, in order to keep moving forward and make things even better than they are.

Isn’t It Fun?

Yeah.  It’s fun.  Creative people love what they do so it feels like play.  But the focused attention, the attention to detail, the commitment, the discipline, challenging themselves to learn more and grow artistically, are all components that lead to the sense of fulfillment.  It’s all a part of what makes the experience meaningful.  It’s all a part of what makes them happy.    

Finding New Answers in Life & Your Business (& For All of Us)

Imagine applying all of that to your life.  Or your business or career.  

What difference would it make?  How would you then impact those around you?  And how would they then impact the people around them?    

Committing to living your own life this fully won’t just affect you.  You affect other people.  And they affect more people.  And the ripple becomes a wave.  If more of us did this, collectively, we could affect the larger problems we’re all facing together.

So what about you?  Where can you start today?

Start small.

Can you simply pay that type of laser-focused attention to one area of your life today?

all the best!

deb

P.S. A few notes:

1)  Do you want to know more about how to start making new choices that lead to a new future?  Grab these free downloads on 'creating:  freedom'& 'creating: attention & awareness.  

2)   If you want to  live this fully, check out this telecourse, "Creating:  Freedom, Wholeness, and a Bright, Bright Future".  You can get in now at the early registration price.  But space is limited, and people are already signing up.  Register today to reserve your spot and start creating the life you deserve.

3)  If this post spoke to you, feel free to stumble it, digg it, tweet about it or share it on Facebook. 

how to make things even better than they already are

It sounds too good to be true, doesn't it?  "Change your thinking, change everything."

It sounds too good to be true because it is.  

And then again, it isn't.

Why It's Not Just About Thoughts

If you dream of doing something in your life, nothing is truly going to change until action is attached to it.  I once heard Marianne Williamson use an analogy that has stuck with me.  She said something along the lines of, "You can sit in the dark.  You can analyze the dark.  You can even understand why it's dark.  But until you get up and turn on the light, it will continue to be dark."

So no.  Just changing your thoughts is not enough.

What You're Thinking

Are you even aware of what you're thinking?  Most often, we're not.  Most often, we're going through life on auto-pilot.  We go to school, we get married, we get the job, the house, the 2 kids and the 2 cars.  We go to church (or don't).  We work out (or don't).  We just do all these things in our lives because...well...it's what everyone else did.  

And maybe, while doing all that, we got what we wanted.  We reached our goals.  We have a life that externally looks the way we wanted it to.  But there's still something missing.  We're still unfulfilled.  

So we look around, but now feel stuck, because we've got responsibilities.  Worse yet, we feel guilty because things look pretty good from the outside.  

What Happens When We Become Aware?

At this point, we might panic.  We might think this means we need a complete life overhaul!

Sometimes, though, that's not true.  

It might turn out that a simple change in the way we think is all we need to move into a realm of greater possibility and a more fulfilling life. 

Did you watch Ben Zander?

If you skipped that video, go back and watch it.  It's not just about music.  Maestro Zander gives plenty of examples of a change in thinking, and how that affects our approach in life.  And the way we approach what we do will have a profound impact on the results we achieve.

It isn't required that we be miserable or living lives of quiet desperation to tap into this.  Ben Zander has been a successful conductor for decades.  He could have continued being a successful conductor in the eyes of the world. 

Instead, he made one small change.  His purpose shifted to bringing out the best in his players, to look for those shining eyes.  He changed what he thought, connecting with a greater purpose, and then took actions that corresponded with that purpose and those thoughts.

Do you need a life overhaul?

Do you need a complete life overhaul? Or could you connect with what you're meant to do, your purpose, change your thinking, and step into the next level of success and fulfillment in your life?  

What will you choose to think differently about today?

All the best!

deb

P.S.  If you want to connect with a deeper sense of purpose, or learn how to change your life by changing your thoughts, or need to make major changes in your life....this telecourse can help.  Click over and see what changes others who have taken the course have made and what they're saying.  And then sign up, because spaces are filling up and registration ends July 31.

leading a life of quiet desperation? (finding purpose & passion)

Have you said any of the following in the past six months?

“I’m stuck in a rut”

“I don’t feel needed”

“I just go to work, day after day, just working to pay the bills”

“There never seems to be enough.  I’m just making ends meet.”

“Maybe I don’t have what it takes”

“I’m bored.  All my satisfaction comes from outside of work.”

“I’m not sure what my purpose it.”

“I used to like to....(do ‘xyz’)...but don’t have time anymore”

“I can’t wait to get to work.  I can’t be myself at home.”

“Work is supposed to be a struggle.  There’s a reason they call it work.”

“I’m not making a difference”

“I’m not fulfilled.”

“I have no choice”

If you’ve said any of these things, you’re not alone.  The unfortunate truth is that Thoreau was right.  Most men do lead lives of quiet desperation.  

Too often, we just try to tell ourselves that ‘that’s the way it is’.  

Or we start looking around for things to force ourselves to be grateful for.  “I’ve got the house, the cars, the kids, the spouse....that I have a job at all is a good thing in this economy.”  

But we’re still not happy.  

Or we remind ourselves that there are people who have it worse.  (Personally, I never think it’s a good sign when you have to look for people who ‘have it worse’.)

We refuse to truly examine our lives, to find the answers.  

Instead, we blame other people or our circumstances, the government or the economy.  

We like predictability.  We like stability.  We like to know we’re safe.  When in most cases, the things we’re staking our stability and safety on can be gone in a moment.  (Ask all those people who worked at the same job for more than ten years who have recently been laid off.)

Essentially, we don’t want to look at the uncomfortable stuff.  We just want it to go away.  Or we anesthetize it with food or movies or shopping or whatever our favorite escape methods are.

Finding Your Voice

It’s a cliche, but it's true.  There’s only one ‘you’ in the world.  And the world is pretty much waiting for you to do that thing you were meant to do.  

What if Michaelangelo had decided not to paint or sculpt?  

What if all those people who have fought to break barriers and ‘be the first’ and make the world a better place had chosen to sit home thinking ‘that’s just the way it is’ instead?  

And no.  Maybe you’re not a Michaelangelo.  But if you put yourself, your true self, out there?  You have no idea how many people you might influence -- deeply.  

I know a woman who teaches marketing.  She’s awesome.  People love her.  Her voice & style are unique.  And it doesn’t speak to everyone.  But to the people she connects with?  She has a profound impact not only on their business, but she inspires them to be themselves in the world too.  

Who are you to hold back?  Why are you holding back?  Do you know what it is that keeps you where you are? The world needs your particular voice.

Stephen Covey calls this your ‘unique personal significance’.  It’s made up of your talent, passion, need, and conscience.  And that’s exactly what it is. Your own...unique...personal...significance.

How Do I Find That?

There are plenty of ways to find your voice, find what you were meant to do, and summon the courage (and support) to do it.  But first.....

1)  Take responsibility.  You have to give up the idea that you don’t have any choices.  You do have choices.  Sometimes we want to go from ‘point A’ to ‘point B’ in a heartbeat, and since we don’t think we have the resources, we decide to settle.  

We ignore the small steps in between those two points that could take us exactly where we want to go.  We give up.  We retreat.  But in doing so, we’ve still made a choice.  We’ve made a choice to stay right where we are and stay unfulfilled.  We can make other choices.  We can take small steps.  

2)  Become aware.  Some call this living in the moment. We become aware of our surroundings, of what brings us joy, of what makes us feel fulfilled.  

We become attuned to our thoughts, feelings, habits, behaviors.  We begin to recognize when we’re feeling connected, feeling peace, feeling passionate about what we do.  It generally feels like being more alive.  

3) Begin to let go of barriers.  As we begin to notice where (or what) is holding us back, we start to release them. We dissolve them, one by one.  This may take some help.   It definitely takes practice.  But we let go of the old ideas to make way for new ones.

 

4)  Participate fully.  We consciously choose.  We choose what to do, what to think, what to feel.  And we begin to choose to immerse ourselves totally in whatever we’re doing.  We become completely engaged, in the moment, in the activity, in being still, in whatever we do in our lives.  

5)  We take action.  We find help.  We start taking those small steps between point ‘A’ and point ‘B’.  We dip our toe in the water and suddenly find all sorts of people who are right there with us.  

We find much more support and encouragement than we expected.  Some things start to seemingly happen out of nowhere, but then we start to notice the connections.  We begin to notice a lightness, happiness, a sense of expansion and possibility.  We get happy.

And Then We Leap

Thoreau also said, "We must walk consciously only part way toward our goal, and then leap in the dark to our success."  

Once we know the joy of being ourselves in the world and doing the thing we were meant to do, we can’t go back.  

Well, we can.  

And we probably will.  

But when we do?  When we try to go back to living the way we were living before?  It will be more miserable than we were before.  Because now we know.  

But Here’s the Cool Part 

When we do that?  We don’t stay there as long.  

Partially because we can no longer stand it.  

Partially because we now have tools and know the way out.  

And we begin to extend the time living our lives in an extraordinary way until that becomes the only thing we know to do.  

What Happens Next?

You spread the word.  You show by example or teach others in some other way.  

You pass it on.  

You pay it forward.  

It’s that simple. 

OK.  It’s not simple. 

If it was simple, we’d all do it and do it consistently.  

But it is possible.  

All the best!

deb

P.S.  If you want to connect with a deeper sense of purpose, or learn how to change your life by changing your thoughts, or need to make major changes in your life....this telecourse can help.